Things I Have Learned In My 1st Quarter of College

For those of you who are new to The Practice, I am a freshman in college and just finished my first quarter at the University of Washington in Tacoma! The quarters are 11 weeks long but man, it went by so so fast! The minutes I spent in the classroom seamed to take forever but the weeks flew by!

I think one of the most important practices in life is reflecting on the past. I don't mean that we should all dwell on our mistakes and live in the past forever, I just think that taking some time every now and then to reflect on what we have learned or taken from a specific moment is very mature and beneficial.

With this quarter coming to and end and even the year coming close to the end as well, this is a perfect time for me to take a look back and see what I can take with me in to the next chapter. Hopefully something that I learn today can also teach you something and save you from learning the lesson in your own experiences. If anything, maybe it will just make you laugh because the college life is not as glamorous as the university websites make it out to be.

So here we go, these are the 12 lessons I have learned this quarter:

1. No need to rush things, time is your friend

From day one, I kept striving to find a way to speed things up and get to "the rest of my life" ASAP. My plans changed everyday as I would find a new route that would be quicker, better, or more fulfilling. I was trying so hard to speed up the process that I was actually stressing myself out. One day my Dad finally reminded me that Time is my friend. He told me to slow down and just enjoy the moment because I don't need to have the rest of my life figured out today, I just need to keep moving forward one moment at a time. I quickly learned that I have the rest of my life to live the rest of my life, no need to live the future today and miss out on the present.

2. Don't be in your own way

In may aspects of my life I had put myself in a box and forced myself to fit into the expectations I had set. I had created standards for what I wanted to do in the future and what "success" looked like for me. Some of the biggest passions and goals I had in life became stressful, unenjoyable, and life sucking simply because I was forcing myself to do it rather than enjoy the process. I set standards and expectations that didn't encourage me to thrive but actually prevented me from achieving my full potential. Don't get in your own way with expectations, allow yourself to be even more than those standards.

3. Don't put all your eggs in one basket

This one works for many different situations. I often hyper focus on making one thing really great and don't put any energy elsewhere. the problem here is when that one thing falls through, I am left with nothing. In High School this was the case with my friendships, I hyper focused on one friendship, but when that friend disappeared, I was left alone with no other close friendships. The same goes for my school life in college, I have been too focused on the jobs and assignments I have to do and haven't invested much time into building relationships. I do believe that quality should come over quantity, but it's good to have variety too.

4. You don't have to share everything with everyone

For many years now I have prided myself on being an "open book" type of person. This often makes me overshare and try to hard to let others see who I truly am. I am discovering now, that it is ok to not share every detail with people. If there are things that you aren't ready to share, It isn't being "fake" for closed off to keep those details to yourself. My biggest problem usually comes when I share details too soon, I have been learning to hold off on information when I'm not ready to share details that are still in the works.

5. It's ok to change your plans or not have a plan

I am a huge planner and I always have ti have a detailed plan in place for me to feel safe and prepared. When it comes to college though, this has put a lot of pressure on me. I am realizing that I don';t need to have every detail worked out for the next 20 years. All I need to do is keep moving forward and have faith and hope for the future.

6. Don't play the victim- It only makes things harder

This has been a huge help for me in many situations. I never thought of myself as a person who would play the victim or not take responsibility, but I totally was. Once I decided to just focus on my part in the situation and how I can improve or do things differently, the whole situation became so much easier for me. It is so freeing to just take responsibility, stop focusing on the other persons issues, and move on.

7. Don't be obsessed with making others proud

My whole life I have been in a constant pursuit of making my parents proud of me. Of course I still want my parents to be proud of me, but I am learning that sometimes I am going to have to make decisions that are best for me, even if it's not exactly what my parents would have decided.

I have learned so many things this quarter, but these are the few things I was able to actually put into words. I can't believe that I am done with my first quarter already! Hopefully this has inspired you, wherever you are in life!

xoxo,

Amy Jo

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